Many tens of thousands of parents have turned to this book for guidance, support, concrete strategies, and practical tools for addressing serious teen behavior problems. By following the authors' clinically proven 10-step program, parents can reestablish their authority and end the perpetual battle of wills--while also promoting teens' growing independence. Numerous realistic examples illustrate how to identify and enforce nonnegotiable rules; use rewards and incentives that work; build trust; and communicate and problem-solve effectively, even in the heat of the moment. The updated second edition includes new scientific research on why some teens have more problems with self-control than others. Parents will appreciate the upbeat, empathic tone.
I. You and Your Defiant Teen
1. What Defiance Is—and What You Should Do about It
2. How Defiance Develops
3. What Does Adolescence Have to Do with It?
4. Is It Just Your Teen's Personality?
5. Where Do You Come In?
6. How to Find a Way Out
II. 10 Steps to a Better Relationship with Your Teen&Mdash;and a Better FutureáForáYour Teen
7. Getting Ready
8. Step 1. Making Positive One-on-One Time a Habit
9. Step 2. A New Way to Manage Behavior
10. Step 3. Contracts and Point Systems:áHow Teens Can Earn Privileges
11. Step 4. Making the PunishmentáReallyáFit the Crime
12. Step 5. Tackling Additional Issues with Rewards and Penalties
13. Step 6. Addressing Defiant Behavior in School and Conflicts over Homework
14. Step 7. Using Problem-Solving Skills
15. Step 8. Learning and Practicing Communication Skills
16. Step 9. Dealing with Unreasonable Beliefs and Expectations
17. Step 10. Keeping It Together
Appendix A. Sample Problem-Solving Worksheets
Appendix B. How to Find a Therapist