This book will aid a person to learn a skill set of unexpected responses to throw bullies (who use toxic verbiage) off balance in their attempt to establish dominance. The techniques are not appropriate for physical assault, serious verbal threats, sexual harassment or other hateful techniques that require intervention from appropriate authorities. Instead, the author presents an arsenal of novel methods and worksheets to help someone: (a) practice four categories of responses that change common attack-attack, attack-defend, and pursue-distance patterns; (b) contrast commonly taught assertive language patterns with disarming responses; (c) apply neuroscience that validates the effectiveness of these methods to reduce one’s resistance to making changes in verbal patterns; (d) recognize character types and situations that breed the need to dominate and control, and distinguish which responses work best with which circumstance; and (e) analyze protocols and surprising technologies to teach new strategies.
"Kate has managed to cram in a mass of information, both technical and research-based, while still managing to weave in elements of experiential narrative that connect the information to our human experience. She is speculative on occasion, which I like to see, but always making it clear when she does so. Please learn from this book and also look for your story, or something like it, because I believe by giving Bully Proof your careful attention, you will find both."
-Richard Hill MA, MEd, MBMSc, co-author of The Practitioners Guide to Mirroring Hands with Ernest Rossi; Managing Editor of The Science of Psychotherapy; President of the Global Association for Interpersonal Neurobiology Studies (GAINS); and author of Choose Hope
"This book is a valuable resource and practical guide for those who have experienced bullying, whether at home, school, or the workplace. Kate Cohen-Posey does a fantastic job helping readers improve their 'bully proof' skill set with easy-to-use, clear, step-by-step techniques. I highly recommend this book to anyone who wants to learn how to manage the bullies in their life using effective, intelligent, and often humor-based strategies."
-Jennifer Sweeton, PsyD, MS, MA, licensed clinical psychologist and author of the bestselling book Trauma Treatment Toolbox
"Kate Cohen-Posey has for decades been at the forefront of educating people how not to be victims of verbal hostility. Her comprehensive new book, Bully Proof, will be a boon for the therapy professions."
-Izzy Kalman, MS, School Psychologist and author of Bullies to Buddies: How to Turn Your Enemies Into Friends
Table of Contents
Chapter 1: Empowering Skill #1: Affirm
Chapter 2: Empowering Skill #2: Ask
Chapter 3: Empowering Skill #3: Actively Listen
Chapter 4: Empowering Skill #4: Hints and Humor
Chapter 5: To Be or Not to Be Assertive
Chapter 6: Bully Proof with Brain Power
Chapter 7: Traits and Temperaments of Tyrants, Targets, and Entrancing Talkers
Chapter 8: Intimate Empowerment
Chapter 9: Intergenerational Empowerment
Chapter 10: Empowerment with Peers
Chapter 11: Empowerment in the Workplace
Chapter 12: Learning Empowering Practices
Afterword and Acknowledgments
About the Author
Kate Cohen-Posey, MS, is a mental health counselor with a clinical practice through Florida Behavioral Health in Lakeland, Florida. Driven by a desire to provide clients concise therapeutic information, she started writing booklets. John Wiley & Sons discovered these thera-tracts, called her, and said, “We think you’re the author we need.” This proposal launched her career as a writer with several titles to her credit: the Brief Therapy Client Handouts books; Making Hostile Words Harmless; How to Handle Bullies, Teasers, and Other Meanies, and more. Booklist, citing How to Handle Bullies, Teasers, and Other Meanies, agrees she is an author of necessity. Kate is passionate about teaching communication and other cutting-edge treatment approaches to professionals and developing such therapy tools as The Handy Brain Model and Brain Change Cards®. Facilitating clients as they manage their own life challenges is her inspiration, joy, and source of new knowledge.